" I don't wear toupee, it's my hair."

“我不戴假，这是我自己的头。”

Other than a bad toupee? I'm kidding, of course. This is my real hair.

除了这顶烂假吗？我开玩笑的。这可是真头。

Duncan wears a toupee to cover his bald head.

邓肯戴了顶假住他的秃头。

Well, he said it was a tribble. It could be a toupee, but either way, it's pretty cool.

他说那是《星际迷航》里的毛毛球。但其实也可能只是假，反不管是哪样，都蛮酷的。

" Your toupee looks like my pet  weasel, " he told Principal Wiggins.

“你的假看起像我的宠物黄鼠狼，”他告诉威金斯。

" Some things are better left unsaid, " said Mr. Wiggins, adjusting his toupee.

“有些事情最好还是不要说出，”威金斯先生一边说，一边调整着他的假。

I was just checking if I left my toupee here.

我看看是不是把假忘这了。

Number two... don't stare at guests who are wearing toupees.

第二 别大眼珠子瞪着戴假的嘉宾。

Well, only to distract from his toupee.

没错 只是为了掩饰他的假。

It's Alfred Hitchcock in a rented toupee.

就像戴着租的假的希区柯克。

Who's not looking at my toupee now?

现谁不看我的假?

Trying to add style is like adding a toupee.

试图添加风格就像戴假。

Grab my toupee right off my head.

把我的假从我头上拿开。

And he was even scarier without the toupee.

而且, 没有假的时候, 他甚至更可怕。

But at second glance — and with a toupee there's always a second glance—he doesn't look quite right.

但再一看——戴了假总会有第二眼——他看起就不太对劲了。

You can't - you cannot live with a man who starts to wear toupee and thinks he is handsome now and rejuvenated.

你不能——你不能和一个开始戴假并认为自己现很英俊并且恢复了活力的男人一起生活。

And I keep telling men - so, you see, rather dead than going to a psychiatrist, but at the same time, rather dead than ever wearing a toupee.

我一直告诉人们——所以，你看，宁可死也不要去看精神科医生，但同时，宁可死也不要戴假。